Lesson 41) Cosmo

If you think about it, a girl's life can be time-lined by which magazine she's reading.

• She starts out as a small child in sneakers that light up and pigtails with her little American Girl magazine that tells her to be pretty on the inside. 
• She then moves into Girl's Life, which I don't think was that popular when I was a tween, but I've seen it around a lot. I'm pretty sure it touches on the topics of that first kiss and such.
• The prestigious moment comes when our girl becomes a young lady and reaches for her Seventeen Magazine. It breaches the world of fashion and what may or may not be going on... down there. It's an introduction to the awkward questions, but sill has the funny stories to keep her light-hearted.
• Then, there's the day she picks up her first Cosmo. We've hit the Glamor and Lucky stage, dear. Baby girl is now a young woman and she wants "50 Ways to Seduce a Man (In A Minute or Less)" to be only a few pages down from "The Most Influential Women in Today's World, and How You Can be One of Them" and "Orange is Back to Stay!" Yes, she still wants the horoscope in the back so that she can find out when her little Taurus self is gonna be blessed with a Prince Charming, but she's left her light up sneakers and braces far behind.
• I refuse to say that Good Housekeeping follows these. Instead, I will say that this woman moves on to Southern Living or Martha Stewart, even. Garden Design and all sorts of categories open up, but I will not be one to hop the Housekeeping wagon, no Ma'am.

However, I would like to propose that maybe one never leaves the Cosmo time of life. I say this mostly because this is where the F500 are right now, and none of us ever want to leave. Perhaps we will remain perpetual college girls. But really, which of our future husbands will complain about that?

The current Cosmo issue actually has the "50 Ways to Seduce a Man (In A Minute or Less)" article, and we have been pouring over it. No, we're not desperate for a way to finally land that cutie from lecture- these things are just hilarious! We started going through the list of ideas other women have sent in. There are comments that range from sexily taking a sip from his drink, all the way to knowing which type of chocolates to bring his mother (because if Momma likes you, you have an automatic in). Sara read them off to us, and let me tell you- there are a few girls that are a little too creative for their own good. 

This is simply the point of life we have reached, and it's interesting to look at. Grabbing my Seventeen, I always wondered what secrets hid behind those sacred pages on the shelf right above. Now here I am, admiring the coming summer colors and trying to do the weight-pumps just like the girl in the picture (btw, who actually exercises looking that good?). 

I dare you, no matter what point in this magazine-line I've constructed you're at, to sneak out and get yourself a Cosmo tonight. Curl up in front of the nightly news, or in your bed where your teddy bear still hangs out and enter the sexy, sale-seeking universe brought on by great clothes and boy talk! Maybe you should still be more concerned about getting your report card or picking up the groceries, but tonight is a Cosmo night, you deserve it.

Curl Girl, out!