Lesson 5) Some Ideas Look Better On Paper

First, please allow me to apologize for the amount of grammatical errors that have been brought to my attention. I will admit that in my excitement to post, I have not done very extensive proof reading. The following posts will be edited much closer, and I thank you for your patience.

Now back to our regularly scheduled lesson!

A list of ideas that have proved better on paper than in practice could literally go on for miles, but I'm going to give you just a few examples so that you can fully understand the point to which I am getting:

1. Communism
2. Fried Twinkies
3. "Guidance" class in elementary schools
4. Lemmings
5. Kegs 'til Eggs Parties

It is the last of these that we need to talk about, partially because it's really the only one I'm qualified to discuss. For those of you who are not familiar with what exactly a "Kegs 'til Eggs Party" is, trust me you don't want to. I'm going to tell you anyway. These parties are generally in the "medium" size, that being between 30 to 50 people, but if you have a pretty rich supporter (aka NOT a college student, but maybe their parents), they can go as big as the house fits. The idea is to drink beer from around 10 pm ("Kegs") through the night and into the hours of morning breakfast ("'til Eggs").  

For any teenager anywhere party-inclined college student, this sounds like a fantastic idea. Imagine how much crazy fun you could have! All that beer! All that dancing! By the time the hangover comes, it'll be time to drink again!

Now, I'm not a big fan of beer.  I'm a picky drinker, in that if I don't like the taste of it there is no way I will be drinking enough for it to have any kind of effect on me. So on the night of this infamous Kegs 'til Eggs, I accepted an invitation to a different shindig, and off I went. My dears Sara and Daphne, however, chose to participate. They were very excited and betting each other how long into the night each of them would last before passing out. Then they were going to go to breakfast and talk about all the awesome things that had happened!

They arrived at the party around 10:30. Coming at the time they did, the party should have already been in the beginning swing. There were kegs, and people, but not nearly enough of either one. There was no way so few kegs would be enough to keep a party tipsy all night long, so my girls weren't off to a great start. Daphne always tries to see the silver lining of things, so she made sure their whole group got a drink, and they tried to make the best of it. However, when a host tries to get enough beer to serve a large amount of people for a long period of time, the beer ends up being cheap. This case was no exception and not even Sara, an avid fan of beer, could deal with the flavor. Having so few people at the party was a significant downer, because having a room that isn't crowded makes it really hard for anyone to lose their inhibitions. A few short minutes later, one of the boys in their group that night called a DD, and they took off to a different party, where they had a great time and made it back to the dorm around 1 in the morning.

The thrill of parties is to go, see, be seen, crazy dance like you're a pro, then grab your group and laugh all the way back to your warm comfy beds (or futon) so that you are ALIVE the next morning to talk about all the embarrassing/brave moves you made the previous evening, and "tell me that you got his number!" It really does seem like a great idea when the Facebook event pops up- hey, it even rhymes! But here's my suggestion: press the "ignore" button, then go hard for a few hours somewhere else.

Let's see it not as: "Go hard or go home!"

But: "Go hard, THEN go home!"

Curl Girl, out!